home sick

seperti kami mengambil nombor bergilir-gilir untuk homesick
though i never showed any signs of my homesickness to the kids
i have never tried to hide it from the other half.
supaya dia tahu perasaan isterinya. kih kih kih

hanna's homesick comes and goes
she's just four
i am not sure apa yang dia homesick kan
probably her grandmother
or if anything upsets her here
she'll just cry and said she wants to go home

as for danish
he's the one yang overly excited to come here
so far he never complaints anything
tapi semalam
as usual for not knowing the main reason
air mata dia jatuh jua
he's gonna be 8 this december
he cried and cried
dan bila mana kita bertanya lanjut
air matanya jatuh tanpa dipinta

it breaks my heart to see him like that
i have tried so hard to make them feels at home
seems that i have to try harder

serabut

hahha dok sini cuti pun mode serabut
ntah apa yang diserabutkan pun tak tahu
cuma hati tidak tenang
perlu dekatkan diri padaNya
so that hati lebih tenang dan tenteram

we have settled mostly everything.
except hanna dinna get placement to any nursery.
so she's gonna stuck with me for a while

hubs dah start busy with assignments and all
danish is happy with his school
cuti sekolah baru ni we had a quick trip to london.
just me and the kids.
hubs ada class so hahah kena tinggal

i have loads on my mind
banyak benda nak tulis just do not know how to put it
my feelings mostly.

nak write about activity
well nothing much
my routine would be
prepare breakfast
aiman's lunchbox
when ayah and aiman off to school
the laptop is mine
till 12 when i have stop and prepare lunch
hubs having lunch at home everyday.
banyak pahala i dok sini just by memasak ;p

hubs off to class after 2
pick up aiman at 3.15
that's about it..
oh don't forget about dinner.

so really that's nothing much
but duduk sini
perasaan sensitif ada lebih
perasaan nak marah tetap selalu ada
again am not sure for what reason.

over the rainbow

Somewhere over the rainbow Way up high,

There's a land that I heard of Once in a lullaby.

Somewhere over the rainbow Skies are blue,

And the dreams that you dare to dream Really do come true.

Someday I'll wish upon a star

And wake up where the clouds are far Behind me.

Where troubles melt like lemon drops

Away above the chimney tops

That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow

Bluebirds fly.

Birds fly over the rainbow.

Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly Beyond the rainbow

Why, oh why can't I?

apa ada pada tarikh

101010

my life now

i like the fact that

i need not worry:

about my tasks at the office

about datelines

about court cases

about problem with land registration etc etc

about having to wake up early in the morning for aiman to go to school

about fussy and irritating clients

about the need to answer to the clients

about having to settle problematic case in the office

i like the fact that i can travel in foreign country



but i do not like the fact that

i am thousand miles away from families and friends that i love

i can't just go out and have lunch/dinner/breakfast as easily as i used to

i can't go out as much as i like to with my bff

i can't leave the kids with their aunts and granny

the limitation of food that i can eat

the need to cook every single day for breakfast/lunch/dinner

though i can travel the budget seems always to be on the way



but i do know that we have to be thankful and to accept that we do not always get whatever that we want.

i will try to live as grateful as possible for whatever that have been given to me

i have few things in my mind to be fulfilled whilst i am here

to be closer to Allah and be better muslim

to be closer to the kids

and to be better mother and wife inshaallah